Montessori Mama 

As parents, we want to shelter our children from everything bad that exists in the world and it can be hard to differentiate when you are truly helping your child out and when you are hindering their growth. Failure is a normal and healthy part of our lives, so to shield a child from experiencing it is actually doing them more harm than good. 

Maria Montessori is known for her radical approach to child development in which the child is groomed for entering the real world right from the tender age of, well, birth. She believed that children are capable of much more than we give them credit for and by allowing them to figure the world out to the best of their capabilities, they are building the strength, resilience, and problem-solving skills that will serve them for the rest of their lives. This methodology, commonly referred to as The Montessori Method, or just “Montessori,” has revolutionized the way young children are taught across the world. 

Many of you have no doubt enrolled children in a Montessori school at some point, but do you truly understand what the “Montessori” part of their school implies? The backbone of the Montessori method boils down to one principle: To give the child the tools they need to flourish in adulthood. While the classroom is a wonderful place for this methodology to take flight, what if you are interested in applying Montessori principles before that point? The great thing about Montessori is that it is applicable to all ages of children, from birth through 18 years old. Research has found that the sooner you can introduce the principles of independence, creativity, and self-led learning, the easier it will be for them to learn new things and think critically once they are in a school setting with other children. These simple yet impactful changes to your child’s environment and home care will open new possibilities for your child and will even help to eliminate potential problem behaviors they have already learned.

Ditch the crib and contraptions that are designed to inhibit your child’s natural movement. Instead, opt for a floor mattress so that if they do roll off the bed, they remain unhurt. This gives them the opportunity to visually explore their bedroom/living space and have free movement to figure out the mechanics of their own bodies. Allowing them to enter and exit their bed without adult permission or assistance builds confidence and trust. By ditching the walker, jumper, swing, etc., and making sure the floor has a soft padding for your baby to roll around on, you are allowing them the chance to teach themselves the most effective ways to move around. They can build their muscles quicker and don’t require assistance from their caretaker to get in and out of anything. Moreover, a walker can confuse a child on the physical boundaries and limitations of their own body. 

Challenge: Leave a wooden toy just out of reach of your baby on the floor and let them figure out how to reach it on their own. It might take some time, but you will be surprised when your help is not required.

Get rid of any toy(s) that do the thinking for your child. When they are small, you really want to focus on their concentration and on the ability to use their imagination creatively. Say “bye bye” to the light up, musical toys that fill your child’s toybox and replace them with long-lasting wooden toys that inspire thought and experimentation. These toys build your baby’s attention span, so they don’t cycle through their toys as quickly and whine when there is nothing actively entertaining them.

Do not offer any unneccesary help. This one is a hard one. When you see your child struggling, it is natural to want to immediately bend over backwards to help them. I’m not saying to not help your child if they are about to get hurt or break something. What I am saying is that you should consciously analyze the situation before you offer help. Really, do they need help? Could they do it without you? Let them try! (This is difficult when you are in a hurry, so plan ahead. If you know it takes your son 20 minutes to tie his own shoes, plan accordingly.)

Create a low-to-the-ground shelf or cubby set where your child’s toys and books can be displayed for them to grab on their own. Refrain from shoving tons of toys in cramped shelves and opt for the toys that they are currently working with while putting the rest in a storage bin for the time being (you can rotate them out as needed). Try to keep these shelves as orderly as possible with a place for everything to go. Children thrive on order and repetition so by organizing their environment in a way that embodies that, they will struggle less and clean up after themselves happily. 

If they are old enough, set up a small water dispenser and cup so that your child can get their own water when thirsty.

Spend time carefully observing your baby/toddler without trying to intervene. See what they spend time on, what their interests are, what they struggle with. Developing this deeper understanding of your child will equip you to select age and developmentally appropriate activities and toys in subjects your child enjoys. Try to avoid being a “helicopter parent” that constantly interrupts moments of play and interest for your child. As a parent your role is to protect your child’s concentration as if you were a jaguar protecting their cub. Do your best to avoid inserting yourself into their concentration flow by asking a bunch of questions that seem harmless, but in the end are more about you fulfilling your needs instead of developing your child in a way that allows independence and freedom.

Did any of this interest you? Do some research to find out in more detail the “why” for each of these suggestions. Explore other ways you can curate a learning environment for your little one despite size and space restrictions. Montessori is truly fascinating (and addictive) once you start getting into implementing changes at home that you can tell have a direct effect on your child’s mood and abilities. I wish you good luck in you and your baby’s journey. Remember that even tiny changes can produce huge results. ν